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We’ve all had those times when we give our lover a romantic gift that we think that they will adore only to have to it fall flat. When this happens neither the giver nor the recipient is happy. Sometimes both become filled with resentment with the giver feeling unappreciated and the recipient feeling like the giver did not care enough to choose something really special. A unique romantic gift can signify that the giver fully understands and embraces the recipient’s passions.

The best way to choose a gift is to understand the person for whom we are buying. If your lover likes spa treatments but would never buy one for them self, that would be the perfect gift. If your lover is a greenie who tries to recycle and minimize waste but still likes luxurious things then an organic gift basket or even jewelry made of conflict free gems and ecofriendly metals may strike a chord. If your lover is a sports fanatic who goes to all the season games then a special present that encompasses either team or sports would work.

An alternative is to build the gift around a special day in your relationship like the day you met, the day you got married or some other special day. For example, the day she cried on your shoulder when her cat died would be an opportunity to give a unique romantic gift that she will treasure always. Get her a Cat charm bracelet or pendant with the name of her lost pet engraved would have her tearing up as she thinks how you really get her. If you met him when he rode to your rescue like a knight in shining armor, or if you just call him your hero, you can get him superhero cufflinks and lapel pins that will put an extra bounce in his steps as he goes to work with your secret unique romantic gift on his cuffs.

How about giving something that she always wanted or something that he never would have thought of getting himself. If she’s an avid romance or fiction reader, a kindle or book of love sonnets would work. If he loves the latest gadgets and seems to have it all, how about a charger pad that gives him a place to store them and charge them all at the same time?

There are so many occasions to find the perfect gift that if you just think of your special someone’s personality, a special day, anniversary, how you met, etc you will be sure to find that unique romantic gift that will have your lover like putty in your arms.

One indicator of spiritual maturity is how we deal with trials. With cogent though jarring eloquence James says,

My brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of any kind, consider it nothing but joy, because you know that the testing of your faith produces endurance; and let endurance have its full effect, so that you may be mature and complete, lacking in nothing. (James 1:2-4 NRSV)

There is something in James’s imperative that resonates with any believer who has embarked with enduring perseverance on their trials. Pastoral care can be seen as a coming alongside, much as we imagine the paralete does, where persons we journey with are warned, taught, and ultimately, presented: every person! Colossians 1:28 calls us to evangelise every person, to educate every person, and to edify every person. We are to reach out to everyone, help them know God’s truths, speaking into their lives. We are called to a life not of self-pity, but of self-scrutiny of motive-especially of service.

We can know, in the final analysis, that the example of the cross is our way toward experiencing the resurrection life of Jesus. This embodies our teaching and our example. And, within the cross-beared life, it is also fundamental that the mature are Spirit-filled persons. The mature person will soon be asked to lead if they are not already. Only Spirit-filled people should lead Christ’s church. Hence, being spiritually mature and Spirit-filled ought to be thought of mutually inclusive. And there will be the fruit of love in the Spirit-filled, spiritually mature person; a love that insists not on thinking about love, but on acting in loving ways. There, I find, an elegant yet unsophisticated simplicity in love. There is no wiggle room. The surrendered soul acts simply as God intends. It is obedience without thought. To be presented perfect on the final day is to approach life now so as to enter through the narrow gate of Matthew 7:13-14, now! Acting as if time is up, we strive more for the Kingdom, more and more. Our striving ought to be to the allegiance of Christ and his teaching, of perfection and imitation of the Father, notwithstanding its seeming unattainability.

The Greek teleios aligns perfection with completion with full development, or to be unblemished and whole. And that is God’s will for us all: that the pastoral care we might all benefit from would take us further on the trajectory of discipleship; further, and onward, unto perfection.

There is incredibly great value in living the spiritual life. When we order our private world, we stand to gain the prize of life that God is ever calling us to. The pastoral care function is primary and basic in delivering persons to the deeper experience of the spiritual life. I see that pastoral care and discipleship are interwoven processes aiming toward the end of maturation, where we may all be presented perfect in Christ.

© 2015 S. J. Wickham.